


The spin doctor, the Oxbridge twat and the pantry

by mrsreeder



Category: The Thick of It (TV)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-24
Updated: 2021-01-24
Packaged: 2021-03-16 11:56:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28956087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrsreeder/pseuds/mrsreeder
Summary: One more reason why Malcolm would never let Julius have his office: having a separate little room next door can be really fucking useful on many occasions. Especially if Ollie drops in after work.
Relationships: Ollie Reeder/Malcolm Tucker
Kudos: 3





	The spin doctor, the Oxbridge twat and the pantry

**Author's Note:**

> Yet another utterly unerotic story from me...I just can't do this, but it's fun, so well. xD This is set right after S2E1, by the way.  
> And I'm so sorry about the title, but I just can't help but use some stupid pun or reference every time (yes this is a really bad Narnia reference, no it has absolutely no relation to the story lol) :D

Ollie sighed exhaustedly as he left the shared office room where he had spent most of the day. Today had been more than eventful, and now he just wanted to get home. But since he had spent most of the day in the same building as Malcolm without any opportunity for them to exchange some words he also didn't want to go home without seeing the older man at least once.

He sneaked along the corridor, taking care not to run into someone else. Most of the office staff had probably gone home already, but it couldn't hurt to be extra careful. But he was pretty sure that Malcolm would still be in his office - he always came home really late and no one knew that better than Ollie. He had waited often enough for Malcolm to come home, only to fall asleep in front of the TV so many times because Malcolm didn't seem to know the meaning of the phrase 'call it a day'.

When he finally reached the door to the familiar room he hesitated shortly before knocking softly on the door. There was no reaction, so he just opened the door a little bit and peeked around it. Malcolm was there after all, so focused on his work that he must have just not heard the knocks.  
"Er...hello, Malcolm?"  
The addressed man flinched a little bit and raised his head to look at Ollie.  
"Why are you still here? I thought you went home with the others."  
Ollie noticed that Malcolm looked really tired today. Well, the job was taking its toll even on someone as dedicated as Malcolm.  
"No, I...well, I just wanted to see you. Just you and me in a room together. Even if I were here almost the entire day we never really talked to each other."  
Malcolm laughed dryly. "That might be due to the fact that we were never alone the entire time. Besides, we had work to do."  
Ollie grabbed a chair and sat down opposite to Malcolm, with the desk between them. "Well, but it's not like it has to be like that every day."  
"I have no idea what you are talking about. Do you think we're partying here all day? Having fucking orgies or whatever? I just didn't have the time to hold your hand all day, you know."  
And that was actually quite the shame, Ollie couldn't help but think. He coughed slightly.  
"Don't tell me...you didn't have ulterior motives when you wanted me to work here at No 10 for the week."  
Malcolm leaned back and mustered Ollie with a weird gaze. "You really got a dirty mind, you little fucker. I wanted you here because I needed someone to help out...and what did you do? You imagined you would spend the entire week getting down my pants."  
Now Ollie looked really uncomfortable. "Oh, no, Malcolm, that's not it...I know that it is a big thing to work here and..."  
"Just spare me the stammering, right? Well, you probably thought that it's a even bigger thing to have a shag in No 10 Downing Street, isn't it?"  
"N-no, but..."  
"But you wouldn't say no if an opportunity presented itself, huh?"  
Ollie exhaled slowly. "...I wouldn't, no."  
"Always the opportunist, I see. Well, that is one of your defining characteristics after all."  
  
Malcolm was pondering about something before he started to speak again.  
"Well, but...," he hesitated shortly, "I wonder if I ever told you about the pantry just next to my office?"  
Ollie was visibly confused about the sudden change of subject. "Huh? No, I don't think you did. Why are you asking?"  
"It's really useful sometimes, you know. When some boring fucker I really don't want to see wants to annoy me, I sometimes just hide in there until they're gone. Works every single time."  
"That is nice, I could imagine...but still: why are you telling me this?"  
Malcolm sighed and got up from his chair. "You really are fucking thick, aren't you? Come with me."  
Ollie was still confused, but he followed Malcolm into the small room next door.  
"Well, that's a nice pantry and everything. But..."  
Malcolm checked whether the door to the hallway was locked.  
"Yes, and there are even locks on the doors, see?"  
"You should totally send it in as an entry for 'Pantry Of The Year', because it's absolutely amazing and the most brilliant pantry I've seen in my entire life. But well, I don't see where this is going, so...I'll be off if you don't need me here?"  
Ollie was quite disappointed about Malcolm's weird behavior. This definitely wasn't what he had had in mind when he had come here.  
But now Malcolm looked at him with a weird, almost hungry look in his eyes. "Well, I think you need me for something, though. And that would be more instructing so you'll be able to work properly here. So...I'll expect you just here. Tomorrow. After work. Or whenever I can spare some time during the day... I'll tell you. Get it?"  
Ollie finally seemed to understand what Malcolm really wanted to say with all this talk of the pantry and work instructions. He coughed. "I...see. Yes, I think you are quite right. Do you think you are free right now, though? I mean, why wait until tomorrow?"  
"Well, aren't you an eager pupil! Always trying to fulfill the teacher's instructions to the utmost satisfaction. I like that!"  
"Yes, I think that's one of my strong suits..." He licked his lips.  
"Talking of suits, that one's fucking ugly. Come on, take it off!"  
"Alright..." Ollie removed his jacket and threw it over a chair. "Better?"  
"Much better." Malcolm grabbed Ollie's tie and pulled him in for a kiss. After they parted again, he said: "Next up are the trousers, they are in the way too...hey, what are you waiting for?"  
Ollie hesitated. "Well...I don't know Malc, do you really want me to undress here...in your fucking old pantry?"  
"Come on, less complaning, more working your hands. Oh well, but I said I would teach you, so I guess I should give you some help."  
Malcolm hugged Ollie from behind, fiddling with his belt and trying to unfasten it. Meanwhile Ollie pressed his hands against the wall for support and he waited impatiently for Malcolm to finally get done with the stupid belt. It didn't help that he felt his lover's ragged breathing on his neck and that honestly almost drove him crazy...in a pleasant way.  
But then, after what seemed like an eternity, just as Malcolm threw the belt to the ground and was reaching for the zipper of Ollie's trousers - a phone started ringing. "Fuck, that's mine...," sighed Ollie. "Well, don't let yourself be distracted though, I'll just ignore the call." But Malcolm shook his head. "No, I want you to answer it. Come on, hurry up."  
Ollie frowned, but fished the phone from his pocket. "Alright, I have no idea why I should answer a fucking call just now, but...just, er, could you put your hands elsewhere for the time being?" He took a look at his phone and saw the caller's number. "Oh fuck no, not that woman again... Er, yes...Oliver Reeder, hello?"  
"Sorry, can't really do that about the hands..." Malcolm reached for the zipper again and Ollie, who had just taken the call let out a yelp. "Agh! What? Er, no, that wasn't directed at you, it's just...I'm busy at the moment and..."  
"Yeah, you're really busy, aren't you?" By now Malcolm had opened the zipper all the way and started to pull down Ollie's trousers.  
"Fuck you, Malcolm, stop that!" Ollie hissed, but of course the woman on the other end of the line had still heard him. "No, not you! No, I'm definitely not disrespecting you, I was just talking to a colleague and..."  
Of course Malcolm wasn't stopping at all. On the contrary, he seemed to have quite a bit of fun. And his hands were going to places where Ollie would have preferred them not to be right now.  
"Er...can I call you back later? It's just not the best moment right now...no, obviously, there never is a perfect moment, but...really..."  
He tried to shake off Malcolm's hands, but to no avail.  
"No, really, I...uh...what? What did you say? That's...no, that's not what I'm doing and I would prefer it if you... Wait...no...don't...!"  
Ollie put down the phone and stared at Malcolm, with an angry look on his face.  
"What? Who was it?" asked Malcolm.  
"What do you think? It was Glenn's fucking piss woman again. She said I sounded like I was horny and asked me whether I was, to quote her, 'jacking off' while I was talking to her. Thanks Malcolm, now that crazy woman thinks I'm some pervert and get off on someone screaming shit at me. Great."  
"Well, she wasn't entirely wrong about that, wasn't she?"  
"She was totally wrong, Malc.... Fuck, I really can't believe that woman was just harping in my ear about this fucking issue about her mother's piss while you were about to give me a BJ..."  
"Dream on, I most definitely wasn't about to do that...that's more your department anyway, isn't it?"  
Ollie didn't know how to refute this claim and so he just gave a long sigh.  
"Well, anyway, this call wasn't really a turn-on, but how about...you just go on now?"  
Malcolm seemed to think that this was a good idea and he was just about to continue where he left off moments ago...but then he changed his mind and whispered into Ollie's ear: "You know what? Change of plans. There's still time for your...first lesson tomorrow. I'm almost done with the work that's left, so...we'll just take a cab home and continue there."  
"But, Malcolm...!"  
He grinned. "Not asking for your opinion here, you twat! I'll finish up quickly and you...should actually finish up too. And then...why don't you call a cab in the meantime? Just try not to sound too horny when talking to the guy from the cab service, right?"  
"Might be a bit hard, but fine..."  
Malcolm leered at Ollie's pants. "Yeah, I could imagine things are quite hard..."  
"Ha ha, you're so fucking funny..."  
  
After Malcolm had left the room Ollie pulled up his trousers and searched the floor for his belt. Well, that had been an unique experience for sure and he wasn't sure how to get that phone call and the woman's shrill voice out of his head. But looking at the bright side of things, Malcolm would come home with him now and they would spend the entire evening together. Ollie couldn't help but grin thinking of the possibilities this entailed. And so he grabbed his jacket and left the room in a really great mood.  
  
Malcolm was back behind his desk, sorting out some papers and getting ready to leave.  
"Did you call the cab already, twatweazel?"  
"Can't wait to get home, Malc? And yet you're telling me not to sound too horny. Well, I'm on it."  
"Just fuck off and hurry up. Or I might undress you again while we're in the cab."  
"I'd like to see you do that! Well, I'll wait for you outside, alright?" Ollie blew him a kiss while he walked out the door.  
Malcolm paused for a moment. "Sometimes I really do wonder why I'm in love with that big fucking idiot..." Then a little smile came to his face. "Well, but even I have my weaknesses...and he definitely is one of them.“


End file.
